okay pat passed out under dana's car
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
