I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
