Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
my being single is dangerous.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
