I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
you guys were way drunker than both of me
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
