are you still at the devil's house?
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
