We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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