it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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