i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
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