Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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