I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
