I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
