Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
