yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
