my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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