i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
