dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
