did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
