Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
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