if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
