In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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