Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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