He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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