youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
