just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize
