Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize