bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
