**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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