Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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