Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
