I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
