Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
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