lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
