I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
