Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
