So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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