walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Randomize
