So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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