Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
