Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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