So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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