just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
