I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
