I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
