am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
