She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
