oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
