Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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