I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
