I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
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