well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
